The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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