I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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