I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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