office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
