if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
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