you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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