look no pants
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
