I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
