i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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