i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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