I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
