Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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