The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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