best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
