office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
