I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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