Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
