Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
