did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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