There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
it was like eating out sand paper
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
