You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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