I am puke
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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