I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
