"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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