when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Randomize
