i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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