I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
