Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
