her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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