If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
you would pick up someone in the library
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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