Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
