dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
