I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
