Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
