i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
