Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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