Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I am naked and annoyed.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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