It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
