Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
