We won't sleep together?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
