What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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