would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Randomize
