The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
