So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
