The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize
