So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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