I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
