my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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