Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
this must be what syphilis tastes like
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize