Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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